


Salt

by DaAmazingMeepers



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Barista Noya, College student Asahi, First Meetings, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, background Tanaka Ryuunosuke/Kiyoko Shimizu, in which Noya Hecks Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 16:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14405787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaAmazingMeepers/pseuds/DaAmazingMeepers
Summary: Noya just wants to prank his best friend for talking about his crush all the time. He didn't expect to get himself a man in the process.





	Salt

Nishinoya wouldn’t consider himself to be a vengeful person. Whether it was someone bumping into him on the sidewalk or taking the last popsicle in the convenience store, it was easy for him to laugh it off and move on. That being said, that didn’t mean that he minded pranking his best friend when he was being especially obnoxious. 

Just last week Tanaka had asked out a cute girl who hadn’t turned him down, and he hadn’t stopped celebrating it since then. No matter what the subject had been beforehand, it somehow always turned back to “you should have seen her man, she’s so pretty!” and “I can’t believe an angel on Earth like her was gracious enough to agree to go on a date with me! I’ve been blessed Noya, blessed I tell ya!” Noya was always happy to support a brother in his romantic endeavors, but there was really only so much he could take, especially when he was still woefully single.

So of course, when Tanaka entered the café that Noya worked at first thing in the morning with the same lovesick grin that he’d been wearing all week, Noya decided that he had had enough. He wasn’t quite sure how yet, but he was going to take his friend down a peg or two. With a small sigh he leaned up against the counter as Tanaka approached, cutting him off before he could begin talking. “Let me guess, Kiyoko was beautiful again yesterday?”

His dry tone did nothing to dim the dopey grin on Tanaka’s face. “You bet she was!” he agreed. “And she actually let me carry her bag for her! Usually she just ignores me when I ask her!” He let out a lovesick sigh and draped himself over the counter. “I’m telling ya man, it’s gotta be love!”

Noya rolled his eyes, although he couldn’t stop the small grin from appearing on his face. “So you’ve mentioned,” he replied. “Multiple times in the last several days.”

Tanaka’s smile turned into a smirk. “You can just say you’re jealous, it’s okay,” he teased.

With a scoff, Noya shoved at Tanaka’s shoulder. “Please, if anything I’m jealous of the people who don’t have to hear you word-vomit sweet nothings all over the place every damn day,” he retorted.

Tanaka brushed Noya’s snark off with a laugh, patting his spiky head patronizingly. “Don’t worry my tiny friend,” he cooed. “One day you’ll find love like I have, although she won’t be as beautiful as my Kiyoko of course.”

If Tanaka were a lesser man (or just didn’t know Noya as well as he did), the glare that was leveled at him would have had him quivering in fear. As it was, it only alerted him that he was pushing the patience of his friend a little further than he should, and he backed off with an almost nervous chuckle. “Anyway, I’ll just have my usual,” he stated, changing the subject.

With a grunt of acknowledgement, Noya grabbed a cup and scribbled “black drip” on it, setting it aside so he could ring him up. Tanaka was one of the few people who preferred drip coffee over lattes, a habit he had formed in high school in an effort to appear more manly. While it didn’t necessarily have the effect he was hoping for, he had soon grown used to the taste.

Once Tanaka had paid and moved on to find his usual seat at the bar table, Noya turned to to start getting the drink ready, only to hear the front door open with the jingle of a bell. He let out a soft sigh and turned back around with his customer service smile in place, only for it to be replaced with wide stunned eyes as he took in the man who had just entered the cafe.

He was quite obviously not at his best, yet he was still easily the most gorgeous human Noya had ever seen, if not the most intimidating. His long brown hair was pulled up in a very messy bun with several strands falling out to frame his face, looking somewhere between ‘I just got done having hot sex’ hair and ‘I barely escaped a hurricane alive’ hair. The look in his dark eyes was intense, and might have been taken as threatening if Noya didn’t recognize the familiar glaze of a sleep deprived college student in it, the dark bags underneath the eyes only confirming this.

He shuffled up to the counter, easily towering over Noya; not that that was difficult with Noya’s height being what it was, but he was nearly a whole foot taller. It would have been more intimidating if he wasn’t wearing what looked like the coziest sweater in existence. The sleeves were even long enough to slightly cover his hands, which must have been a miracle considering his height.

Realizing he had just spent almost a full minute checking a customer out, Noya quickly went back into his ‘perky barista’ mode, smiling brightly at the man. “Hey there, what can I get started for you?”

The man was silent for a moment before seeming to notice that he was being talked to and pulling himself back to the present. “Oh, uh...black coffee,” he finally said, and the early-morning gravelly tone to his voice made a shiver go up Noya’s spine. “But with...like, a bunch of sugar in it.”

Usually when a customer asked Noya to put sugar in their black coffee he told them to just put sugar packets in for themselves so they couldn’t complain if it was too sweet, but he could tell this man wasn’t nearly awake enough for that, so he simply nodded and wrote the order on the side of a cup. When he rang up the order, the man merely pulled a couple bills out of his pocket and dropped them on the counter, leaving before Noya could count them. It was the correct amount, so Noya shrugged and put them in the cash register, but he couldn’t help the way his eyes trailed after the man, watching him as he picked a table to sit at and slumped into a chair.

It was then that Noya happened to glance in Tanaka’s direction, only to catch him staring at him with a shit-eating grin on his face. Once he saw that Noya was looking at him, he started making exaggerated kiss noises. The barista immediately bristled. “Shut the hell up!” he hissed, trying desperately to ignore how flushed his cheeks were getting. “He could hear you!”

Tanaka snickered. “Come on man, you know that guy’s too out of it to notice anything right now.”

While this was probably true, that didn’t ease Noya’s fears. “I’d be more inclined to believe that if I didn’t know how loud you are!” he retorted.

“Look who’s talking,” Tanaka snorted. “Quit being so salty dude, I didn’t ruin your chance to catch yourself a fine hunk of man.”

Noya was about to snap back when an idea hit him, and he froze. Salt. That was it.

He quickly turned so Tanaka couldn’t see the devious grin that had begun to grow on his face and moved to begin making the drip coffee. It didn’t take much time for him to have two cups of steaming black coffee on the counter. In one he poured an ample amount of sugar, just as the handsome customer had requested. For the other cup, however, he dug into the cupboard, glancing toward his friend to make sure that he wasn’t paying attention (he had moved on to playing games on his phone).

It wasn’t brought out often, but there was a box with packets of salt for the customers who bought soup or sandwiches. He pulled out twelve packets and emptied each one into the cup, stirring them in gleefully. This was going to be hilarious.

He put a lid on both of them and set them on the counter, making sure to set the one with the salt closest to Tanaka’s seat. “Black coffee!” he called, making sure that the customer heard him too before quickly turning to find a rag so he could pretend to clean. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the customer grab a cup first, followed by Tanaka after he paused his game.

He glanced over at his friend, trying not to look too eager. Thankfully Tanaka was still looking at his phone, because he had never been very good at disguising his own emotions. He was already having to suppress a snicker as he watched his friend move to take the first sip.

As soon as he tasted the coffee, Tanaka’s face scrunched up. He held the cup up to look at it suspiciously. This was not the reaction Noya was expecting, and frankly he was disappointed; he had been hoping for at least a spit take, and maybe some gagging.

It was then that Tanaka said, “Aw man, I think I grabbed the wrong coffee. This is too sweet.”

Noya’s blood ran cold. If Tanaka had the sweet coffee, then that meant…

He turned and watched as the beautiful, still exhausted customer was bringing his extremely salty coffee to his lips.

Time began to run in slow motion and Noya practically leaped over the counter in an attempt to reach the man in time, but he was too late. A silent wail of ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOO’ sounded in Noya’s brain as the man took a large gulp.

Well, if there was any chance of him getting a date before, he certainly wasn’t going to get it now.

Cringing, he waited for the inevitable spewing of hot liquid and yelling, but it never came. In fact, he was stunned to witness the man continue chugging the coffee down without a single sign that it tasted any different from regular coffee. He didn’t stop until the cup was empty, setting it down on the table with a sigh.

Noya stared at him in shock, his mouth hanging open. He had definitely put salt in that, hadn’t he? He had to have, if the one Tanaka tasted was sweet. What kind of freak of nature was this man?

The customer then seemed to notice Noya standing there and gave him a confused look. “Um...did you need something?” he asked nervously.

Noya’s look turned to awe. “Dude,” he murmured. “That was the most hardcore thing I’ve ever seen.”

The man blinked. “Uh, what?”

Noya slapped the table in excitement, making the man jump. “That coffee was full of salt, but you just chugged it down like it was nothing!”

The man blinked again, looking down at the now empty paper cup and back at Noya. “Oh,” he said sheepishly, his cheeks flushed pink. “I thought it tasted kind of weird, but I guess I was too out of it to care.”

For a moment, Noya could only gape at him. Then he burst out in laughter that startled the customer. When he finally calmed down, there was a wild grin on his face. “You’re really something,” he stated. “What’s your name?”

The customer looked taken aback for a moment before rubbing the back of his head. “Oh, uh, it’s Asahi. Asahi Azumane.”

Noya put his hands on his hips. “Well Asahi Azumane, my name is Yuu Nishinoya, but you can call me Noya because that’s what everyone calls me,” he replied. “And I would love if we could exchange phone numbers so we could get to know each other a little better.”

As soon as the words left his mouth he was reminded by the one rational part of his brain still remaining that asking customers for their numbers was technically against the cafe’s policy, but in that moment he was less worried about that than he was about Asahi potentially thinking he was being creepy. “It doesn’t have to be a romantic thing or anything like that,” he was quick to add. “Not if you don’t want it to be. I just...I think you’re really cool.”

Asahi’s face turned bright red and his hands came up to tug on his hair, which was almost unfairly cute for someone of his size. Noya probably would have enjoyed it much more if he knew whether that was a good reaction or a bad one. Just when he was starting to get uncomfortably worried, Asahi finally nodded. “I-I think I’d like that,” he spoke, his hand coming up to cover his face in embarrassment. “And I…” Here his voice lowered almost to a mutter. “...I wouldn’t mind if it was a romantic thing.”

Noya’s eyes lit up and he pumped his fist with a barely contained “Yesss!” before scrambling to dig his phone out of his pocket. He created a new contact and passed it to Asahi, accepting his phone in return. Once the information was exchanged they passed the phones back to each other, both blushing a little when their fingers brushed.

Unfortunately, the moment was broken when Asahi received a text, and upon reading it his shy smile changed to a disappointed frown. “Oh...sorry, I have to get going. I have to meet with a classmate about a group project.”

Noya drooped for a moment before his usual grin returned. “It’s alright, I probably need to get back to work anyway. I guess we’ll just have to text each other until we get to see each other again.”

This made the smile return to Asahi’s face, and he nodded before standing up and slipping his messenger bag over his shoulders. “I’ll, uh, I’ll talk to you later then,” he said shyly.

God, he was cute. “Yeah, later,” Noya repeated.

As he went out the door, Asahi gave a little wave that Noya returned. As soon as he was out of sight Noya let out an excited whoop, startling the only other two customers in the cafe besides Tanaka, who looked very confused. “What the hell just happened, dude?” he asked.

Noya turned to his friend, his eyes sparkling. “I’ll tell you what just happened,” he exclaimed. “Your wrong coffee just got me a beautiful man’s phone number!”

As if on cue, Noya felt his phone buzz in his pocket and he quickly pulled it out, his heart fluttering when he saw it was from Asahi. However, when he saw the content he couldn’t help but laugh.

_Wait, why was my coffee full of salt anyway?_

**Author's Note:**

> This was based on the Tumblr prompt: "imagine person a of your otp switching the sugar out with the salt before person b is awake. person b makes their coffee before so much as glancing in person a's direction, as usual, and dumps a butt load of 'sugar' into their coffee before drinking it. person a is fighting back laughter and tears until they realize person b is giving them a death glare while they gulp down their entire 16 oz. cup of salty coffee without skipping a beat because they are the alpha and what is weakness."
> 
> As you can see this is really almost nothing like the actual prompt, but this is the scene that popped into my head when I read "chugging salty coffee" for some reason. I can't see Noya purposefully putting salt in Asahi's coffee anyway, so I'm happy with how this one turned out.
> 
> Thank you for reading this! I'll try to work more on my next Haikyuu fic soon!


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